Why are men so obsessed with virility?

‘Man dies after taking aphrodisiac,’ screamed the headline in a local paper last week. In another case, two men from Tsholotsho were admitted into hospital with miniature ‘Leaning Towers of Pisa’ in their trousers that refused to go down after taking an unnamed substance to boost their sexual endurance.

Yet another story described how a 50 year-old man could have directly or indirectly caused the death of a 15 year-old girl after a session of artificially induced passion. Claims were made that this was after the said geezer had consumed a liberal amount of a concoction to prop up his libido.

The implication was that given his age the man, at half a century of existence, would not have achieved such high performance levels without the aid of an aphrodisiac. For the record, the man denied ever taking any such concoction. This unfortunate incident occurred in Bulawayo where I come from which makes me a reliable source on the goings-on in the City of Kings and Queens.

Go to any beer hall KoNtuthuziyathunqa (The city where the smoke billows) and you will observe almost without fail, groups of men passing around a piece of khaki paper containing a ground powder called Umvusankunzi. This, in the local SiNdebele language, literally means ‘arouser of the bull.’

When the rest of the world went crazy over the discovery of Viagra, these men must have been wondering what the fuss was all about since the local version had been in existence since time immemorial. Whether the old man mentioned earlier took the concoction or not is beside the point. What concerns us here is why he should have taken it in the first place?

Which begs the question; why are men so obsessed with their virility? The whole psychology behind the conundrum is that while in pursuit of a basic need, which we assume he paid for I hard earned dollars, he had to make sure that he would not be found wanting.

If there is anything that deflates a man’s ego it would be his inability to perform where it matters most. Had he failed, he might have been the laughing stock of the neighbourhood. In this case the girl in question would have broadcast to all and sundry the apparent inadequacies of the man which in lackadaisical sort of way highlights the tragedy of the episode.

Breaking from the story, let us take a hard look at the traditional reasons for taking performance – enhancing concoctions. In the not-too-distant past, when polygamy was the rule rather than the exception, a man was supposed to ‘satisfy’ his numerous wives reasonably well so as to prevent them from taking their business elsewhere.

Knowing the frailty of the human body especially after the exertions of a normal drinking day, it would be near impossible to undertake these essential domestic chores to the satisfaction of the parties involved. So in the spirit of keeping the family happily together, traditional doctors prescribed anabolic steroids to the males.

These were usually doled out in the dead of the night because males with their trademark obstinacy saw themselves quite capable of the task at hand without any artificial assistance when the opposite was true. Not even the favourite wife knew about these nocturnal consultations.

Nowadays the situation has somewhat changed. Most of the men are now in monogamous unions though modern diet, the taxing working conditions and high alcohol consumption are also known to put a huge dent on their stamina when performing their matrimonial obligations. It is a fact that a man dreads being deserted by his wife for any reason worse still if it is because of impotence.

There are some men who find it hard to believe that impotence is a disease. To them, it is just being inadequate, a straight-forward inability to perform, and period! Hence the need to go the extra mile by any means necessary.

Other pertinent questions come to mind. For instance, should the female partner be made aware that her partner takes a herbal performance enhancement drug? What if she fails to satisfy his increased demands? Does it men that he now can go to the next person in a skirt to tame the raging bull?

So it goes without saying that the majority of women in this predicament will never know about their partner’s curious drug habit if I may call it that. That is as long as their part of the contract is reasonably or exceedingly fulfilled. The whole thing is shrouded in a veil of secrecy. I am yet to hear of a man who calls out to his wife to fetch him his 5 gallon container of Vuka Vuka before they retire for the night. Even the passing round of the khaki paper in the beer hall is a ritual in silence. One isn’t even sure it’s the real thing. I suppose the proof of the pudding is in the eating.

Sexual performance enhancement drugs, whether herbal or artificial, open a Pandora’s Box of potential hazards chief among these being HIV contracted in pursuit of a cheap thrill as it was in the case of our 50 year old murder suspect. The two Tsholotsho men are an illustration of what happens to those who overdose or fail to find a willing partner.

Rape is also common in some of the extreme cases as the need for sexual relief borders on desperate. The murder case itself is giving law enforcement officers’ sleepless nights when it comes to its classification. They are finding it difficult to charge the man with anything. Aren’t we going to see a new statute opened in the law books where men can possibly be charged with ‘murder with a friendly weapon?’ Anything is possible these days.

And by the way, this plan to give aeroplane passengers Viagra in order to counter the effects of jetlag and time lapse, just drop it. There just won’t be enough leg room.

Health Warning: This is a serious issue which is normally discussed in low voices by members of the male species.Women are best advised to pretend they are not reading this.

Notes:

This column first appeared in the Daily News in 2000 which has now been banned. It has been rehashed by the author for a web audience on his weekly column 'Breaking the Wind' at www.newzimbabwe.com

Bulawayo is Zimbabwe's second largest city with a population of aproximately 1 million people.Its called the City of Kings because of its historical past as the capital of the ancient Ndebele kingdom of Mthwakazi ruled by Mzilikazi and then his son Lobengula in the 19th century.